Restoring + Redeeming Your Marriage

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Restoring + Redeeming Your Marriage

I love my husband. We've been married for over 15 years and together nearly 25 at the ripe old age of 36. He's literally sewn into my existence. We are like peas and cornbread- absolutely inseparable. Except back when we were separable- back when we were making our own rules, following our own feelings, and generally doing life (including marriage) our own way.

Way back when, we were stuck together but we both had some strong moments of being ready for that to not be the case. I'll never forget those days. Those long nights of fights and tears- when he finally decided enough was enough. Those are raw, unshakeable memories for two reasons. Obviously for the unshakeable pain entrenched in them for both of us, but even more so for the unspeakable redemption and joy that came out of it all. 

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5 Ways to Grow in Respect for Your Husband {and maybe heal your marriage}

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5 Ways to Grow in Respect for Your Husband {and maybe heal your marriage}

Confession: I have not always respected my husband, treated him in a respectful way, or even thought he was someone who I ought to respect.

I'm going to assume that my husband and I are not the only ones who have ever struggled in their marriage, had deep valleys to drudge through, or huge learning curves to overcome when it comes to pursuing Biblical marriage? I'm going to assume we aren't the only one who've hit rock bottom, maybe signed some divorce papers (and then burned them in the fire)? If you have walked through some seriously rocky times in your marriage, I hope that some of the lessons we've learned together can be an encouragement to you.

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The Secret to Beating Fear {once and for all}

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The Secret to Beating Fear {once and for all}

I know fear. I know earth-shattering, mind-spinning, gut-busting fear that comes in the blink of an eye, that overruns you with anxiety for everyone you know. I know what it means to have every single "worst nightmare" scenario race through your mind every time your husband leaves the house or your child is out of your sight. I know what it feels like to have life going along with everyone being "ok" and then the next moment, they are gone.  I know it well. 

Unfortunately, sudden death is a persistent friend of mine. I've met him time and again, and despite giving him the full breadth of my thoughts about him in no uncertain terms, he keeps showing up. Sorrow and suffering, it turns out, don't take direction from us. When they show up unannounced, all that seems permanent and concrete and never-failing can begin to shiver and quake and flip the world right on it's axis. 

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How to Find Relief from Overwhelming Grief

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How to Find Relief from Overwhelming Grief

Paul said it best when he said, "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." (Phill 1:21)

And Paul knew. He had faced hurricanes, shipwrecks, stonings, beatings, torture unimaginable, prolonged imprisonment... He knew what it was to have much and to have nothing. He knew what it was to be imprisoned, abused, starved, lonely, grieving, and ON TOP OF ALL THAT- a stinking thorn be stuck that he could NOT get relief from- "a messenger of Satan, to torment me" (2 Cor 12:7). You know he had to had times when he was like... Dear Lord- HAVE MERCY.

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The ONE Big Secret to Homeschooling with Excellence

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The ONE Big Secret to Homeschooling with Excellence

Not everyone is called to homeschool their children, but those who are know it's challenging on every level. And it's a challenge so often strewn with criticism and an incredible amount of self-doubt. Homeschool moms are notoriously some of the most insecure people in the world. We seem confident because we're willing to be so counter-cultural, but when it comes down to it, we're frequently overrun with doubts and fear, and so we compare and second-guess at every turn.

Jesus faced many of the multitudinous challenges we also face on a day-to-day basis (and obviously a few more). The disciples did not "get it" every time he told a story. He frequently had to stop and explain what he meant to them (the parable of The Good Shepherd in John 10 is good example of this). And even when they understood at the time, he would still have to go back over and over again explaining the same concepts, telling new stories, giving new examples. He consistently had to refresh and remind them of truth he had previously taught them.

Even when he went to the cross, they still did not have a good grasp of what he was teaching them. Only once the crucifixion and resurrection took place, and they had the resurrected Christ actively in their lives, did they truly gain access to the knowledge and understanding that he had been working tirelessly to pour into them. 

So here's the big secret, and it's a big claim (so bear with me)...

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How to Drop Mommy Guilt {once and for all}

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How to Drop Mommy Guilt {once and for all}

I should be able to accomplish more...Other moms do.

My house is always a mess...If I were more organized and more creative it would look better.

I want to do some fun crafts with the kids, but I don't ever have enough time. Maybe one day I'll get it together.

Look at all she's able to do with 5 kids AND homeschooling... I guess I'm just not made to do this.

I need a nap because the baby kept me up all night, but I should be able to keep going. I'm just being lazy.

She works AND has kids AND she still is able to workout every day. What am I doing wrong? I'll never look like that.

Her kids are always so healthy because they eat, like, perfectly. I'm probably screwing my kids up for life. 

Any of this resonate for you? It does for me. This and a whole lot more. I bet you could add a few more of your own? Attacks and criticisms specifically designed to keep you worn down, discouraged and distracted: Designed just for YOU to have you walk through life weighed down by GUILT and self-critical LIES.

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What Happens When You Invite God to Landscape Your Life

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What Happens When You Invite God to Landscape Your Life

Have you ever thought you were the one helping with the "landscaping" of another's life ? As a mom, a wife, a friend? Or maybe as a mentor to a member of your church? You felt like there was a little piece of life that you kinda-sorta had figured out, and so you decide that you might be able to be the one who's doing the helping instead of being helped? Then suddenly, you realize YOU are being dug down into- landscaped in this entirely new, raw, painful way- and there's a gaping wound pouring out junk you didn't even know was there?  

So you say, Yes Lord, and He begins a great big new work in YOU...

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Open Letter to the Mom at the Zoo Who Lost Her Mind

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Open Letter to the Mom at the Zoo Who Lost Her Mind

Dear Lady Who Lost Her Mind on Her Child at the Zoo,

I am writing you this letter to apologize for the level of judgement and shaming directed toward you after your complete meltdown at the zoo. You see, we stayed at the zoo until closing time, like you did, until the staff usherred us all out. And like you, we saw children begin to absolutely be destroyed and fall to pieces that their day of fun was over with. As we were all herded toward the exit, toddlers began dropping to the ground in pain and agony left and right- like there was a secret sniper on the SkyLift, taking them out one-by-one...

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When you're never enough...

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When you're never enough...

And it feels like the whole world is grasping at you, pulling at you, wanting more and more- and you stand there, mouth open, gasping for air, bone dry. There's nothing left. You've given it all- the hugs, the kisses, the encouragements, the rebukes, the discipline, the redirection, all of the patience, all of the passions. And here you are- an empty shattered cup- and there they are... hands open, still waiting for more. 

Am I alone? I figure I am not. I figure that I'm not the only mom and wife who has given herself so fully that she's given it all away...

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