Stress on the job. A busy schedule at home. Holiday functions. An unexpected illness. An unanticipated death. Each of us faces waves of adversity at various levels and at differing times. However, the way we respond to these challenges in our daily lives often depends on personality and our reliance on biblical truth.

Per the Enneagram (see Ian Cron’s The Road Back to You if you are new to the Enneagram experience), there are three basic approaches to adversity: competency, reactive, and positive outlook. Throughout this post, we will explore the intricate ways that each type tends to approach daily challenges, and the biblical principles and formative practices that can support us through extensive times of need.

As you read, it is crucial to remember that the purpose of the Enneagram is not to pigeonhole you into a specific personality type, but to let you explore the underlying motivations of your actions and examine both your limitations and your strengths. Rather than an all-encompassing personality profile, the Enneagram provides you with strategies and guidance on how you can become a lifelong learner of yourself and how and why you respond as you do to the world around you.

If you love this topic, I GREATLY encourage a thorough reading of Give Them Grace by Elyse Fitzpatrick and Jessica Thompson. This book + many others of my favorites can be found on a FREE book list offered at the bottom of this post.

I'll openly admit that on the spectrum of parenting, my style tends toward the more authoritarian side, but with a nice dash of "wishy-washy" at times. I'll also admit to much confusion over the years in approaches, philosophies, and methods in parenting extremely different personalities while trying to "keep it simple" to avoid overwhelm.

Through my parenting journey, I've learned a couple of profound lessons that continue to mold my approach. The greatest lesson I've learned is that there is no guide to parenting worthy of standing upon outside of scripture.

My own greatest struggle has been the balance between authoritarian "obey the first time, immediately, or else" type parenting vs parenting from a place of misunderstood and misapplied grace that left my strong-willed (or rather weak-willed) children without clear boundaries or consistent consequences. I’ve slowly come to the realization that there is a proper Biblical balance between the law and grace.